bored and more than likely, delirious

current obsession? faking it

particularly, amy raudenfeld

if you don't love amy i dont know what the fuck is wrong with you and we can't be friends.

leather-lovin, moto-ridin, gal-on-gal fan-girlin nerd.

home of "that pervy little xena caption comic."

don't expect continuity - these are random snippets of time, partially dictated by the screen caps chosen and partially by how grossly cheeky i am in that moment. the only thing constant is my wretchedly perverted sense of humor.

drop me a line and say "hullo." i don't bite - i'm house broken.

Reblogged from admhawthorne  167,107 notes
admhawthorne:

jensenackleslikesboyshorts:

saltwaterandink:

nerdreject:

the-eleventh-blog:

empressfalalalala:

jaygabler:

I had to Google this. Worth it.

good lord there are three fics about this commercial on AO3



Oh my god I’m so happy

THIRTEEN THERE ARE THIRTEEN NOW

THANK GOD THIS POST CAME BACK


Yup, every year you know the holidays have hit when you see brother and sister quietly lusting after each other over a fresh, hot cup of coffee while their parents unsuspectingly sleep upstairs. 

someone in that advertising firm read too much game of thrones

admhawthorne:

jensenackleslikesboyshorts:

saltwaterandink:

nerdreject:

the-eleventh-blog:

empressfalalalala:

jaygabler:

I had to Google this. Worth it.

good lord there are three fics about this commercial on AO3

image

Oh my god I’m so happy

THIRTEEN THERE ARE THIRTEEN NOW

THANK GOD THIS POST CAME BACK

Yup, every year you know the holidays have hit when you see brother and sister quietly lusting after each other over a fresh, hot cup of coffee while their parents unsuspectingly sleep upstairs. 

someone in that advertising firm read too much game of thrones

Reblogged from admhawthorne  426,943 notes

squidgybuttblog:

dragonlordoferebor:

was-that-a-pun:

benedictsbanana:

leonawriter:

skinnysanity:

The horrifying moment when you look around for an adult and realize you are one.

I need adultier adult

#I NEED A BETTER ADULT

AN ADULT WHO CAN SUCCESSFULLY ADULT

[ADULTING INTENSIFIES] 

i was gonna say i need someone to adult me

but that just reads wrong

Reblogged from cosimas-clone  255,090 notes

mentaltimelord:

kriegerthewolf:

strawberrinmatsuoka:

rebornica:

sonlco:

eniqmapopstar:

what

WHAT

WHAT

WHaT

crucio

party hard

i’ll have what she’s having.

oh, it’s monday again.

totally sucks, but at least it’s tuesday tomorrow! and while we wait…

photo arms_zps7350e9d3.jpg

look at that face

gotta admit i used to make that same face when i had to wear a dress. although if i looked as good as she does here - i bet i wouldn’t really have complained all that much

nah, i still would’ve whined about it.

photo arms2_zpsd01db230.jpg

i mean look at that mirror. it’s so um, pretty and so nice to look at.

photo arms3_zps259eb3fa.jpg

uh

photo arms4_zps71e107c7.jpg

daaaaaaaaaaaaaaammnnnn

photo arms5_zpse57761cf.jpg

photo arms6_zps68f267ac.jpg

christ jesus.

photo arms10_zpsa66c39d2.jpg

we all know what liam is asking for here. Yes. more of amy’s arms, please.

photo arms11_zpsec70315f.jpg

now if all of you would excuse me, i have to go exercise the fuck out of my arms by… typing. yes. typing.

Reblogged from cosimas-clone  715,007 notes
marionisamuffin:

pleasantandcain:

fromladytolifter:

candidlycara:

dance-in-the-shadows:

gracediamondsfear:

wifeyknowsbest:

whatapreciouslittlefuckfox:


A sense of humor can make everything better. Sex isn’t like it is in the movies or in porn. There will be strange and weird and awkward sounds, there might be a silly interruption like the cat or a kid… you might knock heads or trip getting undressed. Sex is funny, foreplay is funny and sometimes you need to just laugh. It will keep things from getting awkward! If you take sex too seriously you aren’t truly enjoying it!
Not to mention a sense of humor can be really sexy no matter what your gender identity is!

this comic is literally my favorite thing on tumblr.

i’ve always said if you can’t laugh with the person you’re having sex with while you’re having sex with them you shouldn’t be having sex with them.

God.
My husband once walked up behind me while i was sitting in the living room just watching t.v…and he put his penis on my shoulder and said “hello..”
THIS WAS HIS SEDUCTION.
THIS WAS HIS IDEA OF HOW TO GET ME INTO BED.
it worked, but not before I laughed for days.

For that last comment.

I always had a ton of weird funky condoms at my place because I volunteered with Planned Parenthood and did a lot of sex education and sex positive work. I literally had no less than like thirty different types of condoms at a time. So when it came time to grabbing a condom it was a grab bag of WHO KNOWS what you’ll end up with.
Long story short, my boyfriend grabs one, puts it on, heat of the moment type thing, a some point we both look down and see it’s an ELECTRIC GREEN condom. Dead pan he looks me straight in the eye and in his best impression goes “HEY HO. KERMIT DEE FROG HERE.” And I COMPLETELY LOST IT.
On a completely different occasion I said “don’t stop” and he sang ALL of Don’t Stop Believing. All of it. All of it. Right then and there. Without stopping.

Can I add the story about how me and one of my partners had a very enthralling discussion about deserts while I was on top of him?
Or the time my partner’s friends blasted “Eye of the Tiger” through the door and we rocked it out to the beat while quoting the movie?

Story time:
I was with this girl during a trip out to Washington, we’d hung out a few times, and hit it off really well. So we got together one afternoon. Her dorm-mate came home, saw the “Do Not Disturb” sock on her bedroom door and called out “Thrusters to full!”
Not missing a beat the girl and I yelled back “We’re giving it all we’ve got, Captain!” and her roommate started fucking dying outside the door.
Probably should have proposed right on the spot, but whatever.

It got better.

marionisamuffin:

pleasantandcain:

fromladytolifter:

candidlycara:

dance-in-the-shadows:

gracediamondsfear:

wifeyknowsbest:

whatapreciouslittlefuckfox:

A sense of humor can make everything better. Sex isn’t like it is in the movies or in porn. There will be strange and weird and awkward sounds, there might be a silly interruption like the cat or a kid… you might knock heads or trip getting undressed. Sex is funny, foreplay is funny and sometimes you need to just laugh. It will keep things from getting awkward! If you take sex too seriously you aren’t truly enjoying it!

Not to mention a sense of humor can be really sexy no matter what your gender identity is!

this comic is literally my favorite thing on tumblr.

i’ve always said if you can’t laugh with the person you’re having sex with while you’re having sex with them you shouldn’t be having sex with them.

God.

My husband once walked up behind me while i was sitting in the living room just watching t.v…and he put his penis on my shoulder and said “hello..”

THIS WAS HIS SEDUCTION.

THIS WAS HIS IDEA OF HOW TO GET ME INTO BED.

it worked, but not before I laughed for days.

For that last comment.

I always had a ton of weird funky condoms at my place because I volunteered with Planned Parenthood and did a lot of sex education and sex positive work. I literally had no less than like thirty different types of condoms at a time. So when it came time to grabbing a condom it was a grab bag of WHO KNOWS what you’ll end up with.

Long story short, my boyfriend grabs one, puts it on, heat of the moment type thing, a some point we both look down and see it’s an ELECTRIC GREEN condom. Dead pan he looks me straight in the eye and in his best impression goes “HEY HO. KERMIT DEE FROG HERE.” And I COMPLETELY LOST IT.

On a completely different occasion I said “don’t stop” and he sang ALL of Don’t Stop Believing. All of it. All of it. Right then and there. Without stopping.

Can I add the story about how me and one of my partners had a very enthralling discussion about deserts while I was on top of him?

Or the time my partner’s friends blasted “Eye of the Tiger” through the door and we rocked it out to the beat while quoting the movie?

Story time:

I was with this girl during a trip out to Washington, we’d hung out a few times, and hit it off really well. So we got together one afternoon. Her dorm-mate came home, saw the “Do Not Disturb” sock on her bedroom door and called out “Thrusters to full!”

Not missing a beat the girl and I yelled back “We’re giving it all we’ve got, Captain!” and her roommate started fucking dying outside the door.

Probably should have proposed right on the spot, but whatever.

It got better.